Monday night of this week was a dark night of the soul for me. Okay, it was more like a dusky evening of my mind if I’m being honest. I just needed to grab your attention. Basically I laid in bed having a pity party for myself. “Pity, party of 1? Your table is…
Every year it seems I go back and forth on New Years resolutions. Do I like them? Do I not like them? Will I make any? Will I ever get them done? Where am I? Is this a Christmas coma? Happy New Year? What year is it? Who am I? That sort of thing. Every…
If you and I are close, or if you have eyes, then you know that I’m a Christmas lunatic. A cuckoo banana Christmas freak. A disciple of all things Christmas. I’ve been obsessed with this holiday for as long as I have had breath in my body. My earliest Christmas memories involve me sitting on…
There are worse things than being alone. There are worse things than being alone. There are worse things than being alone. I said it over and over again as tears pooled near the bridge of my nose. Underneath the covers I was in a tight fetal position with my arms wrapped around my chest,…
A few days ago I was asked to watch someone’s dog over the holiday. This is a request that is often asked of me. At least 6 to 8 times a year, I have a friend or acquaintance or friend-of-a-friend or friend-of-my-mom ask me to watch their house, dog, dogs, cat, cats, fish, or plants…
Alternate titles for this post: How to Get Away with Ghosting Has Anyone Seen Tony? The Evolution of the ManChild Are You Dead? Desperate Gay Seeks Former Texting Partner Earlier this week I had dinner with a good friend of mine, Janelle. Whenever we get together, she and I inevitably gravitate toward queso dip and…
I’m willing to bet money that you thought I was dead. I’m even willing to bet money that some of you were hoping I was dead. Clearly if I’m not blogging then I must be laying in a ditch somewhere (side note: why is our collective default “dead in a ditch?” I legitimately couldn’t tell…
**Warning: this post contains NSFW language and extreme hilarity** Hello children. Do you remember that one time I promised you a new blog post every Friday? Do you remember how it’s now technically Monday and I didn’t post a thing over the weekend? Yeah. Me neither. Let’s move on. For those of you who religiously…
Please don’t anyone be mad at me but I’m about to start another story and not finish it. It’s just how it goes! Life happens and I’m easily distracted. I will bring you Roman Holiday pt. II in the near future. I will also finish this story. I promise. In the meantime, enjoy this little…
It’s happening again. I can feel it. It’s a phenomenon with which I’m all too familiar. I’m sitting here at Gate A6 in St. Louis Lambert International Airport with my carry-on in tow and a Marry Karr book by my side when a great sense of sadness floods over me. I knew it was coming….
This is a demo store for testing purposes — no orders shall be fulfilled. Dismiss